Faith Formation. Meri.

I'm not a cradle Catholic. I came to the faith as an adult. In 1992 I started to explore the idea of becoming Catholic, and what I found was a faith that spoke to both intellect and emotion as no other version of the faith had done.

The process of my becoming Catholic was greatly accelerated in late summer of that year, when I was advised by my doctors that I needed to have open heart surgery. I had to have an artificial aortic valve. This prompted me and my family and our parish priest at the Church of the Nativity in Dubuque to think that maybe we should not wait until the next year's Easter Vigil for my receiving the Sacraments of Initiation and joining the worldwide fellowship that is the Roman Catholic Church. So, in one day, September 26, 1992, I was baptized, I was confirmed, I was given the blessing of the sick, and I received my first Eucharist. That's pretty fast work; I received four of our seven Sacraments in one afternoon. I couldn't have received the other three. We were already married, so I couldn't do that again; I couldn't receive Holy Orders, because I was already married; there probably wouldn't have been much point in Reconciliation, because I was baptized just after noon, and what could I have done between then and the 4:30 Mass? Heck, what would I have had time to do?

I joined the Roman Catholic Church, and I have not looked back. I have not regretted it for a moment; I find enormous joy in my faith. Now, I attend Mass weekly; I am a lector at the 5 PM Mass at St. Mary's in Davenport in April, July and October; I am a eucharistic minister for the same Mass in May and November. I pray daily. I am loving it.

One memory from the early years: a rather unforgettable mass reconciliation service. One of our kids wore a Coed Naked Basketball t-shirt. She was wearing a jacket to the church, so we didn't know about the t-shirt until we got inside and she took that jacket off. Then it was, "Young lady, PUT THAT JACKET BACK ON and keep it on!"

At such a reconciliation service there are opening prayers and songs, then people go to a priest to make confession. The priests are scattered about the sanctuary; the space is open enough so that it's private, but it's not in a confessional, as such. One of our other daughters - our special needs daughter - went to one of the priests and started her confession. The priest kept looking over at us, which led us to wonder. . .Turns out that our daughter had confessed our sins. At least, our sins as she saw them. Harrrumph.

Time marches on, all too fast. Now, most of those kids have had kids, and Cindy and I are grandparents to ten. Tomorrow, one of those ten will be attending her first religious ed class, and I think she's pretty serious about finding her faith, learning about Our Lord, and joining the Church.

Meri is ten. She's a fifth-grader in the Bettendorf School System. She has a little brother, Logan, who is seven and who lives to push Meri's buttons. Meri is very tall for a fifth-grader; although she's ten, she is already over my shoulder. Brownish-blond hair, green eyes. People who see us together see the family resemblance immediately. There is nothing bashful about this girl.

Meri and her brother have been through a series of shocks over the past year that I don't want to get into here, except to say that too many other kids have been seriously damaged by similar events. Meri and Logan have had a solid rock and good support from their mom and from their grandparents. And, she has learned that part of what makes Grandma and Grandpa the people we are is that our lives are built around our faith. She couldn't articulate all of that just yet, but she does know that this is something she wants to find. So, tomorrow she'll be at the 9 AM Mass with us, and there will be a short ceremony - prayers and blessings - for the kids in Religious Ed, and for their teachers - then Meri will continue to learn, to find a new way to grow, and - who knows? - maybe at the next Easter Vigil she'll become a fully communicant member.

And I pray for our grandkids like I have prayed for no one before.

Thanks for hanging out for a few. Love your reactions.

9-11.

The Book of Job.

I'm in a reflective mood today, largely due to today being the tenth anniversary of the 9-11 attacks.

9-11-01, I was working for the company that is my current employer. I was a Customer Service Associate in the Call Center. My shift started, if memory serves, at 8:15 AM. I arrived in the Center at about 7:50 AM. When I got to the break room, everyone was talking about the plane flying into one of the towers. The television had one of the networks on, and the horror of it all sank in. I clung to the hope that maybe, maybe this was just a terrible mistake in navigation. But the thought wouldn't go away: amateur pilots flying little planes might make such a navigational mistake. But a professional pilot, qualified to fly a large jetliner? I don't think so. . .

Then the second plane hit. All doubt was gone. A jet hit the Pentagon. Flight 93 crashed in that field in Pennsylvania.

What I remember then: confusion. No one knowing how many planes had been taken. Rumors about other crashes. Grounding of all flights. No clue about how many had died, how many injured - people jumping from the upper floors of the towers because since death was imminent that way of dying was preferable to waiting to burn to death, people losing their life partners, kids losing parents. . .For three or four days there were very few calls that came in. Eerie silence.

It's now 8:59 AM Central - the time when the first tower collapsed. Observing a moment of silence.

Now, of course, we know. And we reflect.

Some years ago, Rabbi Harold Kushner wrote a book, When Bad Things Happen To Good People. Kushner looks at three traits we attribute to God. God is all-loving. God is omniscient. God is omnipotent. In this, Kushner's attempt to come to grips with undeserved suffering, he suggests that we must surrender one of those traits. Kushner asks if we can accept the idea that there is a certain randomness in Creation, that things do happen that God has nothing to do with, and that there really is no explanation.

9:28 AM. The second tower falls. Another moment of silence.

Followed by a song - The Sound of Silence. Highly apropo.

I agree with Kushner in saying that we can't explain unwarranted pain. But, surrendering the concept of those characteristics of God? Sorry, Rabbi; I respect your life and your body of work, but I can't go with you there.

God is all-loving. God is omnipotent (and omnipresent). And, God is omniscient.

I recently finished rereading The Book of Job. This was another attempt to wrestle with undeserved suffering. It's one of my favorite books of the Bible. It's one of the most ancient of the books, and one of the more difficult to analyze. Where exactly did that guy Elihu come from? But the central message of Job still hits home.

Let's don't talk about the patience of Job. He wasn't especially patient. Friends arrived to "comfort" Job. They're silent for days. When Job finally speaks he whines like a puppy and cries like a baby. Yet the phrase recurs: "In all of this Job did not sin against God." When bad things happen we are not obligated to grin and bear it. We can tell God what we think. In any interaction between us and God, God is the grown-up. The ones who were upbraided for their sin? The three friends who insisted, "You or someone in your family must have sinned terribly. This must be your fault somehow." Wrong.

Then God answers Job. God's answer? Who are you to put me on trial? Where were you when I created the universe? Behemoth and Leviathan - those creatures you find so fearsome - are but toys to me.

In the end, Job can only bow to the wisdom of the Creator. As must we.

So, hatred motivated the attacks. Why did God not intervene - stop all this pain?

I don't know. Neither does anyone else. But, even so. . .

Praised be the name of the Lord.

And may we honor those who died - those who tried to save others, even if the cost was their owns lives - those who serve to protect us from this ever happening again. Thank you!